Free yourself from old patterns by changing your mindset and start to enjoy your work days, I did this and now have work/life balance and I never even knew I had a problem.
You see my father is a workaholic! He has a very successful business that he loves and his whole life is work, I’m talking up at 5am working till late and on the weekends, it’s his favourite thing to do. I grew up watching this and have modelled this in my own life. I thought that you had to be super busy and super stressed all the time to be able to succeed. Now I realise that this doesn’t work for me, it makes me too stressed and unhappy! I now understand what it means to get more of a work life balance and I can thank MJ and this interview for helping me get there.
“So, I guess we were just speaking off camera about work-life balance, and you were trying to get me to talk about the best time hack or life hack that I can give people in this area, and my answer, just straight, is just do work that you love. Because I can give you all the apps and all the systems and how to do all that, but if you don’t want to do it, you just won’t do it so, assuming that you can work on something that you love, well then the conversation changes.
So, most people want work-life balance. They want to live this very structured “I go to work nine to six or nine to five, and then I come home and my life’s very different.” If you’re doing work you love, and especially if you’re building and running your own business, then there is no such thing as work-life balance. It’s all about work-life integration. You don’t have work over here and life over here. You just have your life.
So, there’s nothing wrong with you working on a Sunday, and then taking your kids for a day off on school and spending all day with them on Monday. Right? If you’re looking for “work-life balance,” you’ll never do that.
Gabrielle: So, it’s really looking at it in another way, because I feel horrified if you said to me, “Work on Sunday, take Monday off.”
Gabrielle: I’m horrified, how can I take Monday off?” So, it’s about changing your mindset around what work is.
Yes, because you personally, you’re in a completely different game. You have control over your time. Right? So I work on Sundays, and people freak out. I have the same thing. I tell people I work on Sundays in my office, and they almost have a heart attack. Like, “What’s wrong with you?” And I’m like, “No, no, no.” I work on Sundays, but then on Monday afternoon, if there’s a basketball game that I really want to watch or book I really want to read, I take three hours.
Gabrielle: So it’s about giving yourself permission to not fall into everyone else’s expectation of timeframes, and what we’ve grown up learning, but actually define more fluidity through your ways and through your day.
Gabrielle: Doing things that you love, when you want to do them.
Yup, because you have control over your time. See, I don’t have kids right now, so it’s very easy for me to work all the time. But then, as soon as a kid enters the equation, it will change. It’s all about recognising what you want to do.
Gabrielle: And doing what you love. I get that now, because actually, I love being with my kids when they come home from school and when I’m in there working and they come home, and I don’t do it, I feel terrible and I don’t get much done anyway. And then, I feel the guilts and I’m not productive. So, you’re saying, get up, go do what you love, and the other part will flow, and I’ll find time to do that at another time.
Matthew: Yes. I don’t know what time they go to bed, but once they go to bed, you could go back to work if there’s stuff you need to do.
Gabrielle: I’m exhausted in theory, I could.
Matthew: And so, especially if you’re running your own business, just dispel this myth that you need to work nine to five, Monday to Friday.
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